Clayton Edger

There are no *s around Clay's name because it's not a video. We're here to tell you about Macula's big gig this weekend. Actually, who better to tell you than Clay himself. Here's the mic Clay...

Hey guys. Saturday, September 2nd at the Lamplighter on Abbott St. in Gastown is going to be the venue for our first show with our new singer. You will not be able to tell by our performance that it's our first. We've been practicing like 4 times a week for the past 3 months. We're definitely planning on making a career out of this.

Three of the four other bands playing that night are also really kickass... the promoter has told us that there are going to be labels there to check out the band that's on second. Obviously these guys would want to check out who's headlining (us) and it could be a REALLY big night for us if we get good crowd support. It's unheard of for a band to get signed at their first show but you can always hope right? Anyways, thanks in advance to anyone deciding to come out and support.

Cheers,
Clay

August 27 2006

Now that was a game.

In between our epic pre-game cheer (a compilation of previous cheers, a "best-of", if you will, with a shout-out to newlywed Kelly - congrats!) and the final out, there was much drama, much excitement, much heartache, and, finally, much celebration. Okay okay, so much of the "much celebration" happened immediately after the final out.. there was still a bit of much celebration after Rod laid down a pressure bunt in the eighth. We'll get to that later. First...

The other semi-final had just concluded, so we knew the finals would be the Sabres vs winner of Biscuits/Indians(us!). The game started well for us. Lee started on the mound, and he was on. And we mean on. Two thumbs up on; Chris can vouch for that. Bottom of the first we got on the scoreboard quicksmart. Two walks to start it off, and then Redge smoking a triple to right-centre.

From there, we kinda coasted, and some details escape us. We do know that Lee had 9 Ks through 4 innings. That's right, 9 of the 12 outs had come via the strikeout. Can't remember how he did in the fifth inning. Perhaps a nice little pixie will come along and enlighten us. Despite Lee's dominance, we couldn't take a strangle hold on the game. We had a 3-1 lead extended to 6-1, and promptly blew that, due to some sketchy fielding and timely Biscuit hitting. They scored one run in the seventh, and then four in the eighth. The Biscuits' bench became more animated with each run scored, and as the tying run came across there were loud cries of "it's a whole new ballgame!" Simmer down lads, simmer down...

Bottom of the eighth was small-ball time. Leadoff man Ryan got on, and stole second. We think the catcher overthrew second and that's how Ryan got to third, but we may be confusing that with another play. At any rate, Ryan was on third, Rod was at the plate, and the squeeze was the plan. The pitch was low, the bat pulled back, and Ryan scampered back to third. The infielders came in for the next pitch, squeeze was called again, and Rod laid down a beauty. The pitcher came home with it but it wasn't even close. We tacked on two more after that, for insurance's sake, and for vanity's sake. The game was in the bag. Or was it?

Top of the ninth the Biscuits loaded the bases. The sacks were juiced. Two outs. A triple would tie the game. A double may tie the game. A single probably wouldn't tie the game. Heeeeeeerrrre's the pitch. It's a liner right at Chris. He snowcones it. This game is ovah.

See alls y'all at the finals. Date and time and place is TBA. Hmmm, after typing that last sentence we checked the Sabres' website. According to them the date of the final is September 10. Time and place is still TBA.

* Kelly Grace *

We tried to embed this video but not only did it not work, it also made Brad's video not work. Therefore...

Click here for Groovin' Kelly at Google Video

Robert: A CC Exclusive

Clubhouse Chatter: What is your favorite post-game hangout?

Robert Aubertin: Anywhere that I can have a sit and a cola

CC: It's 11am Saturday. What are you likely to be doing?

RA: Walking the dogs

CC: Fill in the blank: I wouldn't sell ___________ for a billion dollars.

RA: My blueberry muffin recipe

CC: You've been called up to The Show; what is the first thing you do?

RA: Laugh and cry simultaneously

CC: What stopped you from winning the grade five spelling bee?

RA: The absence of spelling bees at my school.

CC: As a baseball player what is your baseball goal this baseball season?

RA: To play a role in the Indians' championship.

CC: If you were a WWE wrestler, what would your wrestling name be?

RA: Trickster Coyote

CC: What person do you most admire and why?

RA: Off the top of my head, Douglas Adams, because of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

CC: What is your favorite sports movie?

RA: Caddyshack

CC: What is your favorite non-sports movie?

RA: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

CC: Describe an average Sunday in your life 20 years from now.

RA: Taking kids and dogs for a hike

CC: What is your deepest darkest secret?

RA: All my secrets have equal deepness and darkness.

CC: Compose a haiku of your baseball career thus far.

RA: Five years old, lost teeth
Used to be an infielder
Where's my hitting gone?

CC: Let's say that Barry Bonds hits #756 and you end up with the ball. What do you do with it?

RA: Quickly throw it close enough to Bonds so that the lightning strike evaporates both Bonds and the ball. Game continues as if nothing happened. No one ever utters Bonds's name again.

CC: Do you prefer scary movies or comedies?

RA: Fairly equal, maybe comedies a bit more

CC: You can invite four dinner guests, dead or alive. Who are they?

RA: Andy Kaufman, Bo Jackson, Kirk McLean, and Keri Russell

CC: What country that you've never been to would you most like to go to and why?

RA: Portugal, specifically Açores, because it's Sandra's home country and it looks beautiful in photos.

CC: Tell us a good joke. Keep it clean.

RA: A masochist is a person who likes to take a cold shower in the morning; so they take a hot one!

August 13 2006

Sunday's game saw the return of a couple of players fresh off the DL, as our nine-player roster streak ended. Welcome back Josh and Rod; howzabout you keep the punching of metal objects and the faceplanting into trees to a minimum from here on out?

Twas a tight match for the first half of the game. Neither us nor the Brewers could get much going offensively. They at least had Chris to blame. We had no one, and nothing, to blame, except for our sky-high expectations of ourselves which forced us to overswing at pitches which should have been driven much harder than they were actually driven.

The fielding was suspect on both sides. Perhaps the sun is at fault, but there were several pop-ups, flyballs, and foul balls that could have been caught by a little leaguer. Or your mom, your pick.

We loved Lee striking guys out on called third strikes with loopers to end all loopers. They were bailing out onto their asses as the ump punched them out. Nice touch: their coach calling them "chicken sh*ts" both during the at-bat, and while they were doing their walk of shame to the dugout. Not not-loud either.

Highlight of the game goes to Brad. Not for his batting, which was impressive unto itself, but for his idiosyncratic cheering. He had the entire Indians roster, as well as our fan section of the grassy hill, cracking up on several occasions. Wish we could write more about it, but it truly is something you have to see/hear for yourself. His regalement after one of Lee's looping Ks could prove to be the number one highlight of this season. Video footage excluded.

Final score: 9-3 (according to the Brewers website.. can't remember if that's correct or not)

Question for you: On the standings website, doesn't PCT stand for winning percentage? Why then does Newton have a higher winning percentage if we have one more win than Newton in the same number of games? Turned into two questions; double the fun, half the calories.

Clayton: A CC Exclusive

Clubhouse Chatter: What is your favorite post-game hangout?

Clayton Edger: Probably have to be that corner near whalley ballpark where my girlfriends hang out

CC: It's 11am Saturday. What are you likely to be doing?

CE: SLEEPING! DON'T CALL!

CC: Fill in the blank: I wouldn't sell ___________ for a billion dollars.

CE: my sega genesis

CC: You've been called up to The Show; what is the first thing you do?

CE: Steroids

CC: What stopped you from winning the grade five spelling bee?

CE: I was six years too old for the competition

CC: As a baseball player what is your baseball goal this baseball season?

CE: My baseball goal for this baseball season as a baseball player would have to be to just play baseball as well as any baseball player could play baseball and not let the bad baseball games get me down but to feed off the good baseball games that happen this baseball season...baseball. (that's 10!)

CC: If you were a WWE wrestler, what would your wrestling name be?

CE: Clay the wrestler.

CC: What person do you most admire and why?

CE: Hugh Hefner. He doesn't own any clothes that aren't pyjamas.

CC: What is your favorite sports movie?

CE: Fever pitch

CC: What is your favorite non-sports movie?

CE: Wedding Crashers

CC: Describe an average Sunday in your life 20 years from now.

CE: Waking up hung over after a Macula sell out concert at GM place, in time to warm up for the game with the Indians

CC: What is your deepest darkest secret?

CE: I sometimes do a #2 in urinals.

CC: Compose a haiku of your baseball career thus far.

CE: Hit as a lefty
But I throw with my right
This question too hard!

CC: Let's say that Barry Bonds hits #756 and you end up with the ball. What do you do with it?

CE: Throw it at his head and kick him in the pouch.

CC: Do you prefer scary movies or comedies?

CE: comedies

CC: You can invite four dinner guests, dead or alive. Who are they?

CE: Kurt Cobain, Maynard James Keenan, Brandon Boyd, and my Melissa.

CC: What country that you've never been to would you most like to go to and why?

CE: Iraq because I've been told it's a blast.

CC: Tell us a good joke. Keep it clean.

CE: Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.

* Bradley Cumiskey *

Ladies and gentlemen, we are pleased to present to you the world premiere of Dance-Machine Brad. Watch it on the screen below, or click the link underneath the screen.



Click here for Dance-Machine Brad at Google Video

Robin: A CC Exclusive

Clubhouse Chatter: What is your favorite post-game hangout?

Robin Edger: The India Bistro

CC: It's 11am Saturday. What are you likely to be doing?

RE: Laying on the beach at English Bay with my wife.

CC: Fill in the blank: I wouldn't sell ___________ for a billion dollars.

RE: 2 billion dollars

CC: You've been called up to The Show; what is the first thing you do?

RE: Faint.

CC: What stopped you from winning the grade five spelling bee?

RE: The word 'elevator'. No joke, actually happened.

CC: As a baseball player what is your baseball goal this baseball season?

RE: Same as every other year: win it all.

CC: If you were a WWE wrestler, what would your wrestling name be?

RE: 'The Edge'.

CC: What person do you most admire and why?

RE: Tough one. I have a lot of admiration for philanthropists and people who are just generally trying to make the world a better place. Bill Gates, Bono, and Jeffry Sachs come to mind.

CC: What is your favorite sports movie?

RE: Field of Dreams. You know why.
[editor: cuz Kevin Costner is sexy like you?!]

CC: What is your favorite non-sports movie?

RE: Tough one. I'm going with 12 Monkeys.

CC: Describe an average Sunday in your life 20 years from now.

RE: Wake up; go play baseball with the Surrey Indians; go straight to the hospital after the game and begin the 6-day recovery process.

CC: What is your deepest darkest secret?

RE: I don't want to get into specifics, but lets just say his name is Rob Aubertin.

CC: Compose a haiku of your baseball career thus far.

RE: a few decent years
then an mvp season
now, ride off my rep

CC: Let's say that Barry Bonds hits #756 and you end up with the ball. What do you do with it?

RE: Spit on it. Wipe it off. Then sell it.

CC: Do you prefer scary movies or comedies?

RE: Comedies.

CC: You can invite four dinner guests, dead or alive. Who are they?

RE: Socrates, Socrates' translator, Pierre Trudeau, Lee Harvey Oswald (I gotta know).

CC: What country that you've never been to would you most like to go to and why?

RE: France. I'd get to practice my French, and I'd get to enjoy all the culture.

CC: Tell us a good joke. Keep it clean.

RE: A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender laughs and says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper looks at the bartender, with a look of extreme confusion on his face, and says, "You have a drink called Steve?"


[editor: apologies for lack of images. but blame blogger.]

July 23 - August 6 2006

Yeah yeah yeah. We know we're a little behind in the whole blog-posting department. FYI, this is a nonpaying gig and it's been a busier than normal summer, so three words for ya: Get over it. Now that we've got that unpleasantness behind us, let's get to it...

On July 23rd we could barely assemble a barely cognizant crew to face the inept Playaz. It was the day after RobE's wedding (congrats!), and we had to call him up to get him on the field as our ninth player. Luckily it was a night game, as we don't think an early morning call would have gone over well. ("But we realllllly need you dude.. c'mon, did your priorities get skewed overnight?") We recently heard that his bride watched The Notebook alone while her hubby played. Sad, but not as sad as forfeiting to the Playaz would have been. Kudos RobE, you've got Indian blood in ya.

The game was not so much a game as a glorified BP session. Final score was 21-1, as we collected 14 hits, six of which going for extra bases, and tallied a remarkable 18 base on balls. Good eye, Indians, good eye. Perhaps BP, in this case, stands for Batting Patience. After a season long slump, also-recently-married RobA (congrats!) pounded out five hits, including two doubles, and scored four times while knocking in three. The pitching was exceptional, including five strong innings from Ratty, and surprise performances by Clay and Kelly.

Our next game on the schedule was an August 2nd midweek rematch against the Playaz. Unfortunately, we learned in the days prior that the Playaz forfeited that game, as they were folding for the season. Sad news, as they seemed to get enough players out to the games by gametime.

Next up: the Sabres, a formidable opponent. The August 6th game was our second straight with just 9 players. Injuries and holidays were taking a toll on our roster, which we won't harp on about cuz we still manage to notch plus-ones in the win column, this time a 10-2 victory.

Highlights from this game:

• Clay's 5 stolen bases (17 in 11 games - yowzers!)
• Lee's 5 solid innings pitched, averaging a K an inning.
• The win.

With one more game on the sked (Sunday the 13th vs the Brew Crew), let's keep this wagon wheel going right into the playoffs. Who are we kidding, we've already played that game. Stay tuned for a post on that game after a post or two of CC Exclusives.

Rodney: A CC Exclusive

Clubhouse Chatter: What is your favorite post-game hangout?

Rodney Wingrove: first my fridge than my sofa

CC: It's 11am Saturday. What are you likely to be doing?

RW: either hiking or mountain biking and sometimes nursing a hangover

CC: Fill in the blank: I wouldn't sell ___________ for a billion dollars.

RW: my spot on the indians roster

CC: You've been called up to The Show; what is the first thing you do?

RW: buy a video camera to film everything

CC: What stopped you from winning the grade five spelling bee?

RW: I could only spell swear words I got susspandid

CC: As a baseball player what is your baseball goal this baseball season?

RW: to pitch a no hitter

CC: If you were a WWE wrestler, what would your wrestling name be?

RW: Mr. Tickle-Pants

CC: What person do you most admire and why?

RW: My father good athlete good person and a great dad

CC: What is your favorite sports movie?

RW: Major League

CC: What is your favorite non-sports movie?

RW: Kobe Tai vs. Jenna Jameson or Hot and Ready Vol. #6

CC: Describe an average Sunday in your life 20 years from now.

RW: Playin ball with the over 40s Indians

CC: What is your deepest darkest secret?

RW: I think Scott Sibley has a great ass

CC: Compose a haiku of your baseball career thus far.

RW: Really want to hit
but Im sitting on the bench
please put me in coach

CC: Let's say that Barry Bonds hits #756 and you end up with the ball. What do you do with it?

RW: Probably sell it than pay all the pitchers in the majors to throw at him

CC: Do you prefer scary movies or comedies?

RW: I like scary comedies

CC: You can invite four dinner guests, dead or alive. Who are they?

RW: Kevin Cash, Vernon Wells Alex Rios and Pat Borders

CC: What country that you've never been to would you most like to go to and why?

RW: England lots of historical sites, football and beer

CC: Tell us a good joke. Keep it clean.

RW: Why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 8 9 (ouch is this thing on?)